02 décembre 2007

Doc, save me...

I have been in Tunis for almost two weeks and I couldn’t have enough time to write down some thoughts on my blog. Actually, I haven’t anything special to speak about, just that same old story, and I’m fed up with it. In two weeks, one could do so much things but I didn’t. I just made a new friend (C…) really different from the others. I think we’ve got enough similarities and that should be why we became good friends in such a short period. He’s different because he’s depressive, as I am. We spent a lot of time speaking about ourselves and our unrests; it was so hard for me because I couldn’t express myself easily. We were missing school since we didn’t sleep at night and I’m crazy about that. We tried to help each other but there was nothing to do. Honestly, C… tried more then I did because he’s good at hiding his unrest and I think he is feeling calm this period; I just wanna thank him for being so kind with me. Now, I realize that it is nonsense to expect someone to save me from what I’m, or someone to bring sense to my life. In other words, neither friendship nor love could make me feel better. A friend can’t bring a goal in my life; he can’t make me feel comfort with myself. I used to think that a girl could do it by giving me all the love that I need but it was wrong. I can’t play seduction games anymore and that’s why I lost my butterfly. People can’t do anything for me, and even if they did, it won’t be so helpful. I am sure now that the revival is gonna happen because I’m going to bring the solution from the inside. Last time, I spoke about the therapy and today I told my mother about it. She was crying her depressive son but she seemed to understand the situation. Thanks mom. I really need your support. Now what? I got to call the surgery to fix a date for my consultation… I hope I’ll do it for soon. I am afraid.

PS thanks for C… again

8 commentaires:

vivant-mort a dit…

You're welcome.

SoEnLion a dit…

"I wanna be somebody else" As Pink Used To Sing.

I have the impression to never know you, but I'm curious to see what you will look like.

sojen a dit…

happy that u figure it out ,kind of late(referring to how u’re ;wondering ..
hope u’ll come across some other salients facts that I did’nt find the courage to tell of t u!
just remember that u have by here some friends that u could rely on , I wrote this down just to say
Behave man,life’s too short

SELMA a dit…

bon courage

shadow a dit…

Et c'est donc cela que tu t'éforçais à me cacher! c'est pas très sérieux tout cela je pensais t'avoir donné ordre de t'amuser moi!
Cela me peine vraiment de te savoir dans cet état et je ne peux que te dire i'm always right here when you need me and i'll never be sad to help if i can :)

Unperfectchild a dit…

ça me fait de la peine de te voir arriver à ce stade,
rabbi m3ak!!!!

Angel a dit…

It is my first time that i visit ur blog,i'm really surprised there is a lot of sorrowness although u re so young! be positive try to enjoy ur time by doing what u like, and don't rely on others to solve ur problems, no body can help u like u can do to ur self! try to write down u major problems,worries that cause u harm and begin to work to solve them one by one ..u have this new year as an opportunity!...fight man... don't let the depression win!

muse a dit…

It's true that the solution should come from within you, that u should be self-centred and that ur life meaning must emanate from you, still i strongly believe that pp who love u can do a lot. so u just need a real close friend and a true big love.once these are done, u ll feel much better.